Breaking the Vicious Spell of Sexual Addiction

One might have fantasized about the gorgeous women they ever laid their eyes on but if someone went ahead to conquer each and every such woman in an endless but a methodical quest then such an individual might be considered to be prone to sexual addiction. Though, it may not sound like a life threatening situation but the social and the psychological implications of this condition will make you think otherwise.

Sex addiction has a major difference than other types of addictions like alcohol or drug addiction as it involves the act of sex which is a normal activity that is performed regularly unlike consuming alcohol or drugs. However, sexual addiction is basically all about engaging in a relentless pursuit of sexual pleasure despite the knowledge of its consequence to oneself and others. It is an addiction that can permanently damage a person but just like all other addictions it too can be cured with the right treatment.

An essential key to the right treatment of sex addiction lies in understanding the key reasons behind the addiction. There can be various causes like early exposure to inappropriate sexual activity or materials or physical, sexual and emotional abuse especially during childhood or the adolescence period. Growing up in rigid and disengaged families also can contribute to the development of sexual addiction in an individual as such families tend to ignore, restrict or make the child feel inadequate and as a failure. Thus in such circumstances the child tries to escape from his family issues and resorts to sexual fantasies like masturbation or engaging in covert sex early in life to escape from the tensions.

Addiction recovery in such cases starts with helping one to stop that behavior first. All this can be done by attending these recovery oriented support meetings or to maintain a support system via a therapist or a support group with the back up of a sponsor. Also some professional doctors can offer counseling and therapy in cases of sex addiction but the role of family and friends in encouraging and supporting the individual is instrumental in faster treatment. Also, the infamous 12 step sex program for treating addictions states sexual addiction as the most difficult to master is it would involve an extremely dedicated approach to treat the addiction. However, one of the most effective ways to conquer sexual addiction is by counseling strategies like individual counseling, group counseling, counseling of the addict’s partner and couple counseling. The motive of these counseling sessions is to help not only the addict but also the partner or the spouse who faces trauma due to the addiction.

Prior to treatment a person caught in sexual addiction might perform sexual acts to feel safe, comfortable and accepted but it is one condition that separates an individual from everything in life that a person holds dear. And the only way one can break out from a situation that will destroy one’s social structure is by going through addiction recovery. While alcohol and drugs have to be bought, sex is a normal experience and this recovering from an addiction based on a routine act is difficult without help.

Personalised Gifts for Teenagers – A Guide to Getting It Right

Buying gifts for teenagers is a real minefield. In fact, with so many potential pitfalls, chances are you’ll be raiding their ‘hidden’ supply of vodka just to pluck up the courage to ask them what they want. That said, if you’re determined to get them something that isn’t made by Apple and doesn’t involve a wireless controller, you could do far worse than having a look through the range of personalised gifts for teenagers currently available online.

If, however, you’re still unsure, have a quick read of our fun-loving rundown to the different types of teenager*. It might just help…

1. The Pretty Ones

It doesn’t matter whether they’re a boy or a girl, you can spot these ones a mile away. They’re the group who look like an adolescent advert for Abercrombie & Fitch. They exist to look good, they dress in only the finest designer labels, and can pull a pout to make Posh look like an old bulldog.

2. Flirts

These are the guys and gals who aren’t blessed with the looks of The Pretty Ones, but who always seem to attract the attention of the opposite sex. They’re not exactly intent on a long term relationship, yet their relaxed morals always seem to garner lots of interest. Can’t think why.

3. Drama Queens

A more difficult group to sum up, Drama Queens are the teens to whom everything is a big deal. So don’t be surprised if they’re rather ‘thesp’ and throw jazz hands left, right and centre. Basically, they love the attention, even if they have to become some weird fusion of Bruno Tonioli and Craig Revel Horwood to get it. They’re also likely to gossip. Just think Glee’s Kurt.

4. Jocks

Okay, so it’s a very American term. But every school has them. They’re the guys who live for sports and hang out in their own little brotherhood. They have a tendency to act like lobotomised gibbons around those outside of their inner circle, with greetings that include dead arms and head slaps.

5. Teachers’ Pets

Generally seen as a substrata – and not a very popular one at that – Teachers’ Pets are still likely to prosper long term. They know what it takes to succeed, even if it means they’re the victim of the Jocks’ dead arms and head slaps. Homework is done to a high standard and on time. And exams are passed with flying colours.

6. Emos

It’s short for emotional, so you’ll already be getting a picture. You’ll also know the look – skinny-fit jeans, tight T-shirts and a pair of All Stars or Vans. Hair tends to be long and facial piercings aren’t out of the question. Rock and punk is the music of choice, along with an outlook that makes Kurt Cobain look chirpy.

7. The Moron

Okay, so the title may be harsh, but falling into this category isn’t the end of the world. They’re not the sharpest knives in the drawer, granted, but they’re typically kind-hearted and popular among peers. It’s also not uncommon for The Moron to excel at one subject – usually PE or art.

8. Health Nuts

Most health nuts tend to be lads. They exercise and like there’s no tomorrow and diet on high-protein foods. Why? Because they want to look buff. Past times include the gym, runs, and doing weights in their bedroom. And when it comes to socialising, expect a tight T-shirt to show off their work.

9. Nerds/Geeks

Nerds are a substrata that share close ties with Teachers’ Pets. As a rule of thumb they aren’t as gifted across a range of subjects as the Teachers’ Pets and instead focus their efforts on a particular field. They may also be more inclined to rebel in their own little way – by hacking into the files of MI6, for example.

10. The Mysterious Ones

Think Christian Slater in ‘Pump Up the Volume’ and you’re about there. These are the boys and girls who keep themselves to themselves, but have a natural magnetism that attracts others. They’re typically bright but go out of their way to hide it. Chances are there’s a rebellious streak, too.

*Please be aware that this ‘guide’ is unlikely to represent a specific teen. We’ve conducted no research into our publishing and accept no responsibility should you ‘drop one’ by categorising your kid in the wrong section. Moreover, if, while searching for presents for teenagers, you rely solely on our ‘findings’, feel free to pop yourself into number 7.

Talking About Sex With Your Teenager

Answering teen sex questions and talking about sex with your teen can be difficult, uncomfortable, embarrassing, and awkward….and that’s when it’s easy. For teens and adults, answering teen sex questions and dealing with teen sex issues can be one of the most difficult aspects of parenting. The fact is, though, that your teen probably already knows more than you could possibly imagine about sex, and what they’re really looking for from you is truth, honesty, and a sense of comfort.

Teens and kids even younger than that are exposed, not only through TV and movies but through advertisements and books and hearing kids talk in the hallways at school, to every possible sex topic. Kids can be watching the most innocuous television programming and be exposed to Viagra ads that openly discuss erectile dysfunction. If you’ve never even had the “birds and the bees” talk with your teen, that can create an entire litany of questions.

Yet teen sex and teen pregnancy are once again on the rise. In the states, the rates are increasing at a rapid rate. Experts blame the increase on the conservative right political efforts to have abstinence only education in schools. Many teens are not being taught about condoms, or are being given false information about condoms through these programs.

What your teen really needs from you is the understanding that even if both of you agree that teen sex is not something your teen should be doing and that abstinence is the best policy, that it is still possible that something could happen. Your teen needs you to arm him or her with the knowledge that using condoms does save lives, prevent STDs, and prevent unplanned pregnancy. Your teen must trust that you are the source of information that will rise above embarrassment, politics, or social pressure to be the voice of compassion, reason, and understanding.

If you have a teen, you can be guaranteed that with or without your teen’s consent, his or her body is being prepared for sexual activity. It is the way in which humans perpetuate the existence of our species…we are made to have sex. If you’re the parent of a teen, you need to be answering teen sex questions honestly and openly. Don’t stigmatize sex or make it difficult for your teen to come to you with concerns.

Since they most likely already know more than you expect, the role you play is more about building trust than actually teaching them anything about sex. Your role is to reassure them and be a safe place to turn. If you need help knowing what to say to your teen about sex, start by letting your teen know that you are there for him or her. Use opportunities like TV shows or other moments when sexual situations are portrayed to let your teen know that if he or she has questions, you’re happy to talk to them. Don’t minimize your teen’s feelings, and reassure your teen that you care. By opening the dialogue, your teen will be more likely to come to you for information than seek it from a friend at school or the internet.